The Lifeline of Community
It’s the most wonderful time of the year! The holiday season is often portrayed this way at least as it is a time for family, laughter, and celebration. For many though, this season brings its challenges: loneliness, grief, or the weight of unmet expectations. These struggles can feel even heavier for those in the LGBTQ+ community, where acceptance may lack at family gatherings, and chosen family may be far away. During these times, finding connection and support is essential. Not only does this connection offer support, but sometimes, a lifeline.
A few years ago, I hit one of my lowest points. My days were heavy; moving though each waking minute seemed to be impossible. The act of simply waking up and getting out of my bed was a challenge in itself. There was no motivation, no drive, no energy. My dog would sit at my bedside, staring and whimpering until I mustered up the strength to take her outside. She was the reason I got out of bed during these particularly dark times. She was my reason to keep going.
Recently, in therapy, my therapist shared a story that resonated deeply. She spoke about meeting a woman who, after a suicide attempt, was asked what kept her going. Her answer was straightforward: her dog. As I sat there, I couldn’t help but relate as this woman’s story mirrored mine in many ways. There is something incredibly grounding about the companionship of a pet. Their presence alone can remind you that you matter.
Today, I am fortunate to have a large support system. I’ve surrounded myself with friends, collogues, and loved ones who never fail to life me up and help bear the cross of life’s challenges. But I will never forget the days when I felt my dog was my only lifeline. Her companionship was my community, and it sustained me until I was able to establish what I have today.
Companionship is essential for our mental health, especially during the holiday season. It can be found through a pet, a friend, or a larger community. Pets, in particular, offer a unique kind of support. They are nonjudgmental, constant, and they require us to show up, even when we don’t want to. Although, human connection is equally vital.
So how do we find support when we need it most?
Start small. When feeling isolated, reach out to a friend or family member. A text or a call can go a long way. If those relationships feel complicated, consider getting involved in the community somehow. I joined my local rugby club. I didn’t know anything about the sport, in fact, I’ve never really been too athletic. However, joining that community opened doors to a whole new chosen family. I found a group of like-minded and accepting humans. Many organizations host holiday events and gathering, providing a sense of belonging so consider exploring community groups where you can connect with others who understand your experience.
Volunteering is another powerful way to build connection. Animal shelters, food drives, and community centers are often in need of extra help during the holidays, and giving back to your community can create meaningful connections while also lifting your spirits.
For anyone who feels overwhelmed or like they need more structured support, seeking professional help is always a good idea. Therapy and support groups can provide a safe space to process all of the emotions and find strategies for coping.
The most important thing to remember is this: you don’t have to navigate this season—or life—alone.
Looking back, I have a lot of gratitude for the growth that I have experienced. My dog was my starting point, but over time, I’ve built a world of support including chosen family and professionals who have helped me stay grounded. Support doesn’t always look the same; it can come from unexpected places, and it evolves over time.
If you’re struggling this holiday season, I encourage you to take the first step towards connection. Maybe it’s a call to a friend, a visit to a local LGBTQ+ center, or just simply spending time with a furry companion who loves you unconditionally. Community is out there, waiting to catch you. All it takes is a little bit of courage to reach out.
You are not alone. Let this be the season to find your lifeline, in whatever form it may take.
